A Long Way From Home
The second I read the quote above I gasp — a long breath released from my tensed up state of mind as I tried to make sense of 2018.
I couldn’t find the words to sum up my year that would fit nicely into a social media caption. What to say? I could write about all the negative things like getting fired at 24, navigating old and new friendships, moving (gah I hate moving) or I could choose to only show the highlight real of travels, beaches and a new apartment.
In my heart sat both joy and pain, contentment and longing, steadiness and curiosity.
Last year was filled with a lot of decision making. At the beginning of the year, I was healing from rejection from jobs and adjusting to a new city. Not soon after I was healing from getting fired. I had no job in a new city with no immediate family or close friends near by. It wasn’t suppose to be this way (have you ever said that under your breath?)
It was pretty tough. On paper, it all looked crazy. It looked like I should have given up on what God told me to do because my faithfulness didn't yield my desired outcome.
Outcome is God’s responsibility, obedience is mine.
Those trials produced resilience and perseverance — and maybe that's what God wanted all along. For my circumstances not to determine my character.
What would have happened if I stay stilled? If I just gave up? Well, I'm not sure what would have happened because I didn't choose that path.
I chose to trust the water underneath my feet, and in a well that never runs dry.
"If I would have stayed still, I would have never known the bravery of my heart and the faithfulness of the water," Molly S.
So how is your 2019 going so far?
Pursuing your dreams is not easy. It takes guts to leave everything behind for an unknown future. It takes reliance to hold on to the promise in the process.
Looking back I can sum up 2018 in four words: living on a promise.
I believed with confidence that God told me to pick up my life, serve at a church, and impact the city of Charlotte. It sounded crazy in 2017 and still sounds crazy in 2019. But no matter what's next; I will follow his voice. I won't stay still -- I will run towards God's perfect will for my life. Even in those oh-so-real imperfect moments.
I want this post to encourage you to action. You may not know what's on the other side of saying “Yes.” Instead of standing still in indecision — move. Say yes to the new city, new job, new friend, solo trip, coffee date or whatever it is.
You will never know the bravery burning on the inside of you if you just stay still. You will never know how strong and creative you are if you let fear cripple your hand from picking up the pen, paintbrush, camera or microphone.